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Recently I came across a short article titled " Stop Pretending to be Perfect". Intrigued, I dove right in and quickly found that I could relate. I remember those days vividly. I, as a young-(ish) wife and mom, had somehow gotten the idea that perfection equaled success. Where did that come from? Was it something I brought with me from my childhood? Maybe. Was it something I learned from church? Possibly. Could it be a misinterpreted impression I got from watching other ladies who seemed to have it all together? Definitely! You see, what I failed to understand was that most of those "perfect' ladies weren't. They had issues. They had rough days. I just didn't see that often. What I DID see, however, was what Dorothy saw when she looked at the Emerald City; a bright, shiny, clean, organized, balanced, happy place where all your questions and desires would be realized and everything was perfect. How would I ever accomplish that? I couldn't. This wasn't reality.
You see, the problem was that I was trying to live up to an imaginary idea of what the Proverbs 31 woman was. While she reads like a shining example that we should hold up as our standard as Christian women (and she is), we must also remember that she was a woman JUST LIKE US. I'm sure she had bad days. I am sure her home was not always 'magazine ready' . I bet there were days when she left the house with mascara on only one eye and her breakfast consisted of the stale cheerios on the floorboard of her trashed mini-van. I'm sure there were days when she struggled just to get through that day.
I wish I would have had some ladies who portrayed real life to me early on. Ladies who, while they strived to be entered into the Proverbs 31 hall of fame, stayed real and let me see their flaws. Then maybe I wouldn't have been so consumed with perfection, because, let me tell you, while my children may not remember how clean their home ALWAYS was and how their clothes ALWAYS looked perfect, they WILL remember the times mom had a melt down when the toys didn't get put away.
Titus 2 encourages those of us who have been married a while and who have been raising or have raised children (the correct way) to teach the younger ladies. Let's cut them some slack and not set the bar so high. What is wrong with being real and teaching them that they can be great wives and mothers even when they feel like they can't be perfect? How horrible would it be to mentor a young wife/mom and be honest about your own issues then & now? I know it would have been a HUGE help to me, personally, and maybe I wouldn't have been so overbearing and exhausted. Maybe, just maybe, I would have enjoyed my family more and worried about appearances less. So, ladies, both young and old, I ask you, Can we PLEASE stop pretending to be perfect?